It’s raining men.
OK, it’s just raining water, but still. Still feeling the effects of last night’s rerun of “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy”. You know they’ve picked a winner make-over victim when even I’m saying, “Oh, sweet Jeebus” during the Fab Five’s initial sweep of the apartment. My favorite line? “The lighting for this place costs less than a pack of cigarettes.” Given recent taxation on tobacco, that might not be saying much, but still.
So here’s a glimpse into my recent life: I get home after a long day at work. I went for my usual run. Showered, and waited patiently for potential roommates to show. Only one of three scheduled visitors does. Luckily, I’ve got WWE Smackdown to tide me over in the meantime. Then, I watch “Queer Eye”, and get semi-misty cuz the episode revolved around a guy’s marriage proposal, and then I’m thinking, “Man, I wanna get engaged under a Moroccan tent”, and then I give myself a piledriver for being a sap.
Yeesh.
I need to be on this show. Not because I have a desire for fame, but I could really use some new candles.
Luckily, Woody Allen has been watching my life recently and went and made a movie about it. Good lord. It’s actually painful for me to watch that trailer. So, watching that saps my romantic tendencies a bit, which is always a good thing.
So here’s today’s pop quiz. I’m pretty sure I’ve blogged this before, but I’m too lazy to look it up.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. So they say. I’d say that’s true for people, who, on a 1-10 beauty scale, fall in the 3-7 range. Outside that, and you’re pretty much got consensus on either “really attractive” or “I didn’t read about any breakout from the zoo”. Couple this scale idea with the fact that people generally tend to date within one standard deviation of their own attractiveness. This is why it’s so weird to see a Level 3 Looker dating a Level 8 looker. It doesn’t make sense. A Level 8 can date a Level 9, or a Level 7, however, assuming a standard deviation of 1. Thus, by proxy, a 2 will date anyone between 1-3. So here’s today’s query:
Does a 2 know the person they are dating is a 2, or do they see them as a 10?
People might get annoyed by this question. Sorry, but at some basic level, YES, there are ugly people. Hate to break it to you. There are also really evil people, too. And the Tooth Fairy? That’s just your mom, man. Gotta chill. It’s only a website. Simmah down now!
But seriously, I overheard the just most awful-looking woman on the T last week blabbering on about how she “didn’t want to settle down” and how she had to “keep her options open”, and I really didn’t detect a hint of irony, mostly because I was striving to believe that multiple people didn’t want to see this she-beast naked. She is getting plenty of action. Back in the day, most of the Harvard campus would recoil from the fact that it was obvious that the Harvard Marching Band was seeing more ass than a rental car. And you know it’s bad when Harvard students consider others ugly. We’re not the most becoming lot, I’ll readily admit.
But seriously, does a Level 2 see their partner as a Level 2, or a Level 10? And if a Level 2, is it because they can’t imagine they could get any better? (And yes, personality can be important here, but only so much when life’s kicked you off the ugly tree and let you hit every branch on the way down.) I’d love to hear thoughts.
This entry has been brought to you by the “I’m So Much Prettier Than You” Foundation.