Wading in the Velvet Sea

What I hope to show is that within the very fabric of "Wannabe" lies the entire scope of womanhood---their strengths, their weaknesses. Their hopes, their dreams. Usually about how they like it in your face.

Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
really really wanna zigazig ha.

OK, well, right off the bat, we can tell these are desperate women. They are on the edge. Time is of the essence. They have something that they want, and they are making absolutely sure that the person they are talking to is paying attention. Thus, the constant iteration of telling them what they want, what they really really want. By the end, the desire is so overwhelming that language itself escapes them. They are reduced to a mere guttural phonemes. ‘Zigazig’ has been traced, in actuality, to an ancient form of Aborigine dialect, coupled with a touch of Sanskrit. Loosely translated, it means ‘tell me what you want, what you really really want’. Laughing at their own cunning linguistic skills, the girls laugh, indicated by the word ‘ha’.

If you want my future forget my past,
If you wanna get with me better make it fast,
Now don't go wasting my precious time,
Get your act together we could be just fine

Obviously, the Spice Girls are calling attention to that other great English musical meditation on mortality, Pink Floyd’s ‘Time’ from the album ‘Dark Side of the Moon’. No, we cannot in fact waste their time. (Ironic, since they wasted roughly 28 seconds announcing that they had something that they wanted. Certainly, a more efficient manner of expression could have been located under less pressing times, but these times are obviously too dire to expect normal, rational behavior. We can tell now that these women are clamoring for a man’s attention (well, maybe not Sporty Spice, but’). He needs to get his ‘act’ together and they’ll ‘be just fine’. Perhaps they have a 2-person scene in Acting Class the next day, and she needs him to spend valuable rehearsal time with her?

I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
really really wanna zigazig ha.

Now, ne could just assume this is a simple reiteration of the primary motif, but as if possessed by Philip Glass, they tweak it ever so slightly. If you listen close to the inflection on ‘zigazig’ here, you realize the derivation is entirely different. Clearly this instance culls its linguistic source from Anglo-Saxon blank verse, a Bazooka Joe comic strip, and the drunken ramblings of that dude at the bar who wouldn’t get off that chick’s case. Loosely, translated, it means, ‘In five years Jewel will look exactly like Ginger Spice’.

If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends,
Make it last forever friendship never ends,

It’s easy to snicker at the first line and think that this wonder girl is encouraging a gang-bang with her version of The Babysitter’s Club. But nay. Look it up, Oxford English Dictionary, 7th definition: ‘get: when coupled with ‘gotta’ before and ‘with’ afterwards, means ‘punch in the groin’. Hey, wait a second’

If you wanna be my lover, you have got to give,
Taking is too easy, but that's the way it is.

If anyone in the world can parse those last two lines, you’re a better person than me. Maybe it’s a commentary on mercantilism. Beats me.

What do you think about that now you know how I feel,
Say you can handle my love are you for real,
I won't be hasty, I'll give you a try
If you really bug me then I'll say goodbye.

OK, all of a sudden the Fast and Furious Five wanna slow it down a bit. Maybe all the groin punching has left them a little winded. They are showing distressing signs of enabling abusive behavior on the man’s part, since they are willing to give the guys a try after physical violence. Then again, it’s their bizarre ritual, and who are we to judge the behaviors of others? Still, they leave the door open to kick the boy out, asserting a submissive, coy style while asserting GIRL POWER all at once. (Roughly translated: I need you to help me move some furniture next week, so I’ll be nice to you in the meantime, you stupid twit.)

Yo I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
really really wanna zigazig ha.

OK, apparently they had a change of mind, and now we’re taking the highway to the danger zone again. Too much Oprah watching. Now they are ready to bend your manhood like Beckham. Not pretty. Just back away, slowly. Sloooowly. There’s the door. You’re almost there’

If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends,
Make it last forever friendship never ends,
If you wanna be my lover, you have got to give,
Taking is too easy, but that's the way it is.

Ok, typical woman. Changing her mind on a dime. This time she does mean a gang-bang. In other words, she’s a keeper.

So here's a story from A to Z, you wanna get with me
you gotta listen carefully,

OK, shoot. I’m all ears.

We got Em in the place who likes it in your face,

Not even gonna touch this one with a KY-covered pole.

we got G like MC who likes it on an
Easy V doesn't come for free, she's a real lady,

OK, prostitution=real lady. Spice Girls Math is Fun!

and as for me you'll see,
Slam your body down and wind it all around
Slam your body down and wind it all around.

I’m pretty sure that, if needed, I could slam my body down, but there ain’t much on me that can wind. I tried once. Ended up in traction. Not fun.

So what have we learned today? We got some linguistics lessons, we learned about the 6 degrees between Baby Spice and Roger Waters, and Em likes it in your face.

And that’s one to grow on…