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February 06, 2007
The Best Laid Plans of Mice and Best Men
A few thoughts upon returning from a “scouting trip” for my brother’s upcoming bachelor party…
1) Wow, tux rentals sure got expensive since the last time I was in a wedding. Gosh darn that inflation. This better be one heckuva tuxedo. It best be adorned with flashing LED lights that respond rhythmically to the music from the band. Also? It better come with Kate Winslet.
2) If you advertise on your website that you host functions, it’s a good idea to always have those function rooms available, even just to view. Or, you know, have a manager around to describe to us the function areas. Because if you don’t, you lose our money, and we’re going to be spending quite a bit that night. My brother’s not getting married everyday, you know. Maybe like, 3 days, in total, but not everyday, damnit.
3) If and when you do in fact meet a manager, and he works at a fairly mainstream place, and you tell him you’re thinking of having your bachelor party, do, under all circumstances, tell him upfront that you will not be importing strippers into his particular place of business. Because he will wonder, and he will ask, and in those few precious seconds between your announcement and his inquiry, much awkwardness will be shared on all fronts.
4) If you’re 31 years old, don’t do a shot on a Tuesday night. You’re not impressing anyone, especially the artificially enhanced bartender who takes your order. You only leave tipsy and unable to come up with five topics for your blog that night instead of the expect five. You know, theoretically.
Posted by Ryan McGee at February 6, 2007 10:47 PM